Francine Bonnecelli* swore off relationships the day her husband
of nine years left her for a twenty-something barmaid in San
Francisco. Even though this was her third marriage, she felt
three was the charm and, after all, he showed all the qualities
in a soul mate and a marriage partner that no one had ever shown
her. After this traumatic experience, she closed off her heart
to future relationships, giving up on the theory that you can
find THE ONE who meets all your goals and expectations. Jennifer
Quigley*, fresh out of college, had enough of her share of
?flings? and was ready for that someone special to enter her
life. However, after every date ended up in the bedroom, she
vowed that she was going to give up dating altogether. ?It?s
just not worth it,? she said. ?There just are no more good guys
left. I?d rather stay home with my cat or go out with friends.?
Joseph Freemont* married his childhood sweetheart fresh out of
high school. After graduation, they married and one and a half
years later, became the proud parents of a strapping baby boy
they named Michael. Two years later, another child joined their
family and then a year later, the third child was born. Joseph
was a good father as well as a good husband, delighting his wife
with anything her heart desired. He laughed at his good luck and
never took advantage of the situation by treating every day with
his family as if it were the first. Twenty years to the day they
married, Joseph lost his wife to terminal cancer. He grieved to
the point where he could not come to grips with her passing and
decided from that day forward he would never look at another
woman again. What do these three people have in common? They
have all given up on looking for their soul mates altogether and
have closed off that path of their journey which is necessary
for total self-growth and finding their higher selves. While
they have entered a comfort zone inside themselves to ward off
the pain, they have closed it to whatever soul mates who might
enter their lives in the future. When they put up this shield,
they have also cut off a very necessary part of their life?s
journey. And why is this bad? The reason is that, unknowingly,
they have severed an important and vital part of their
well-being. They have retreated within themselves to the point
where finding love has no meaning anymore. And, in so doing,
they have opened themselves to the prospects of getting
stress-related diseases and losing what zest they have left in
their lives. In the case of Joseph, grieving is a natural
process and one that should be completed before he even thinks
about carrying on another relationship. If he were to jump right
into a relationship, without going through the entire healing
process, only disastrous results would occur. However, in time,
Joseph will heal and he will start to feel those old feelings of
having someone to share his life with. Whether he acts on these
impulses, it all depends on whether he is comfortable within
himself to do so. This will take a lot of time for Joseph to
come to this point, but he has to realize that shielding himself
from his other soul mates is not going to help him heal. By
allowing these soul mates to enter his life, he will realize for
what reason his deceased wife came into his life and left so
abruptly. It?s all a learning process and one in which Joseph
needs to enter in order for him to release the negativity he is
bestowing on himself in the name of grief. Francine and Jennifer
are merely products of bad relationships. Both figure what?s the
point? Until they release this negative thinking, they will
bring this baggage into whatever future relationships that may
be in stow for them and it will be a pattern they will continue
until they realize that this negative thinking is what is
preventing them from finding their true soul mates and finding
the happiness they are looking for. Baggage from past
relationships shouldn?t hinder you from giving up on finding
your soul mate. Once you understand that they all served
purposes towards your self-growth ? even the bad ones ? and you
can work through the karma associated with it, you?re that much
closer to finding your higher self. It?s your higher self where
you find the life, the creativity and the love you deserve.
*names have been changed # # #
About the author:
Author and soul mate expert Dorothy Thompson is a one of the
nation?s leading authority on soul mates. Her book ?Romancing
the Soul? and ebook ?How to Find and Keep Your Soul Mate? are
one of the most comprehensive guides to explaining what soul
mates are really all about. To receive a FREE special report on
?Ten Tips in Identifying Your Soul Mate,? visit her personal
website at http://www.dorothythompson.net or her soul mate
advice websi
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