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IF "ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE,? WHY CAN'T I BALANCE MY CHECKBOOK?
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Author: Rev. James L. Snyder
Topic: Finance
Viewed: 41 time(s)
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For me, the most terrible time of each month is the day our bank
statement comes. We commonly call it BSS (Bank Statement
Syndrome). I don't know why it is, but I have trouble getting
the parsonage checkbook to balance with the monthly bank
statement. That ominous document intimidates me every time it
arrives. After all, the bank's business is keeping track of
accounts. They have hundreds, maybe thousands of accounts and I
have just one. On the surface, it seems a rather simple thing
for me to keep our checking account up to date, but I assure
you, it is not. Every time I try, I lose interest. Keeping our
checkbook accurately balanced is almost like a circus balancing
act; everything is up in the air. No matter how often I add
those figures, I never get the same result twice. I have
resorted to adding up the figures at least three times and then
take the average. So far, I've been batting a .195 and have been
dropped by the major league, which has lost interest in my
career. This may satisfy my conscience but it does little to
appease the accounting department of my friendly banking
institution. The thing flustering me more than anything else are
those fees. The average bank has more fees than a West Virginia
hound dog has fleas. Everything I turn around there is another
fee. (I need to stop turning around.) Somebody needs to invent a
fee powder. Each bank must employ a stable of employees whose
only job is to dream up these fees. How else can you explain it?
These fees are creative enough to cover every aspect of a
person's wallet, retroactive three generations back. To open an
account there is a fee. Each account carries a monthly
maintenance fee. I have been paying this monthly maintenance fee
for several years and I have yet to see someone from the bank
come out and mow my lawn. What is this maintenance fee? What are
they maintaining? They certainly are not maintaining my
checkbook. With all the fees I am paying, I would expect someone
from the bank come to my house, sit around my table, and help me
balance my checkbook. I would supply the coffee and donuts -for
a small fee of course. Another thing I do not understand is the
ATM fee. Why do I have to pay money to the bank to get my money
out of the bank? Whose money is it anyway? I think banks offer
monthly bonuses to the employee who comes up with the most
creative fee for that month to impose on its customers.
Fe?Fi?Fo?Fum all those bank fees are dumb. Once upon a time and
far far away, banks would bribe customers with toasters or
umbrellas to open accounts with them. Those very days are over,
you can be sure. Now, I'm the one bribing the bank to keep my
account with them. Last week I slipped the cashier the usual
quarter and asked her to make sure my deposit got in my account,
please. I do not know whether it is bribery or just a gamble and
probably would do better with the Florida lottery. I would not
mind it so much if only my checkbook would occasionally agree
with the bank statement. It takes a lot of effort on my part to
keep some semblance of order in my checkbook. I am not always as
successful as I would like. I make mistakes and sometimes they
cost me. At my bank when I bounce a $3.75 check, I have to take
a second mortgage out on my house to pay the fee. I would close
my account and transferred to another bank that there is a
closing fee, a transfer fee and a fee that has no explanation
whatsoever. Just a goodbye jester from my bank, one last chance
for them to screw up my checking book. Some people think God
should do everything for them. All they have to do is sit back
and enjoy themselves and God will do everything for them. A
prevalent attitude about faith supports this erroneous notion.
Someone once compared this idea of faith as putting a "nickel in
the slot and pull the lever" and you get what you want. Some
things in my life only God can do and I need to understand what
they are and allow Him to do them. However, some things in my
life God expects me to do. God will never do these things for
me. I must come to grips with this distinction. If I don't, my
life will be miserable. Some people are sitting around waiting
for God to do something He is expecting them to do. As they
wait, they become frustrated and start accusing God of all sorts
of sinister things. Part of getting to know God is understanding
this. What is my responsibility as a Christian? What does God
expect from me? An Old Testament verse puts much of this into
perspective. After Solomon dedicated the Temple God responded by
saying, "If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble
themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their
wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive
their sin, and will heal their land" (2 Chronicles 7:14 KJV).
For the most part, many people are sitting around waiting for
God to balance their checkbook when He has put the pencil in our
hands.
About the author:
Reverend Snyder is currently ministering at the "Family of God
Fellowship" in Ocala, Florida. More of his articles are
available for reprint at his website: http://www.godspenman.com/
Rev. Snyder is available as a guest speaker. He writes a weekly
column and is the author of "You Can Always Tell a Pastor; But
Not Very Much " available at:
http://www.jamessnyderministries.com/
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