Today was a beautiful day, one of the last great days of summer
I presume, considering it is officially Fall. Typically, our
house would be filled with the sounds of neighborhood children
playing either laughing, crying, arguing or being unbelievably
quiet. The quiet times are when I need to worry most.
However, today my home is instead filled with sounds of only my
own children because I made the decision to say "no" to friends
today. Our home is the primary gathering point, which most days
I completely welcome. I do prefer to know where my children are,
what they are seeing, watching, and hearing. Occasionally though
I have days like today that I enforce an official time out to
the neighborhood gang, which I lovingly refer to as a "friend
break."
I normally do not mind playing the host, mother, and mediator to
my children's friends, but sometimes it is nice to just have a
family day. Now my children at first resist this idea and whine,
"what will I do, who will I play with", and the list goes on.
Their friends also have a hard time initially taking this news
and eventually ending stopping by or calling a few hours later
to see if the verdict has changed. I've learned when this
happens not to cave, to stay strong and stick to my decision.
Otherwise if the children detect your weakness they will work
unanimously to change your mind. By all means, don't let this
happen as if you do you are setting up the tone for your next
"failed" friend break.
It is important to be patient and amazingly you will see your
children start playing with their own siblings, being nice to
each other, and having fun. The best part is you can actually
enjoy some quality time with your kids since they're no longer
concerned with when and whom they can play with next.
Today, because I chose to say "no" to friends for my children,
we have enjoyed a beautiful family day. We have played
basketball, had intimate chats, buffed, trimmed and painted our
nails and truly enjoyed each other's company. It is also
refreshing to know that my cupboard is still full with snacks
and drink boxes for school tomorrow and won't need to be quickly
replenished.
The best part of saying "no" to friends today was that when I
sat down to write this article my daughter asked me what an
article was. I explained many articles are similar to a story.
She also decided to write an article and so she did. It was
called, "Why I love my Mom!" My younger daughter colored a
picture of flowers for me and asked how to spell, "I love my
Mom". Not bad for a parent who was in the dog house earlier
today for calling a "friend break." I suggest you call one
someday too!
About the author:
Tina Frazer is the founder of Let's Be Friends.net, a friendship
website exclusively for women. Let's Be friends.net promotes and
encourages new friendships among women. Meet and make new
friends online who share your lifestyle, interests, or values.
Perfect for stay-at-home Moms, Working Mothers, empty nesters,
young, young at heart and those new to town. Membership
available to women 18 and older at http://www.letsbefriends.net
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